In my day to day life, I have told very few people about my hair transplant. I’m embarrassed that at 24 I had [wanted] to do this. Before the age of 12, I had long (very long), thick hair. I would tie it in a bun and it would be wet for almost two days.
I looked like a freakin’ Cocker Spaniel…
Around 12 years old I was losing family members left and right, I was gaining weight, and I got this really bad sunburn on my scalp while at the beach. After that, I started losing my hair. My mom took me to a few dermatologists, and no one could come up with a reason for me to lose my hair.
7th grade, April 2002
As I moved into high school, I cut my hair short and pretty much didn’t let it grow past my chin. Keeping it cut regularly made it look a little bit thicker and healthier. The longer my hair got, the more stringy it appeared, and the thinner it looked. I dyed my hair all sorts of colors: pink, orange, yellow, green, blue, purple – you know, typical teenager things. Darker colors always looked better, blonde tones made me look a little more bald. I have this uncle who insists that the reason my hair is thinning is because I’m fat and I ruined my hair. He likes to stand over me and say “hahaha, at 50 I have more hair than you…hahaha”….as if it’s funny.
Armagh, No. Ireland, July 2012
My hair loss progressed. I started losing a lot of hair on the top of my head, so I started parting it on the side. It looked a little better. But, as time went on the top of my head got worse. Most pictures that I take of myself are missing the top portion of my head. If I’m in group pictures I try to keep my head tilted up a little bit. I will be in a conversation with someone, and occasionally I can see them looking at my hairline….It’s really embarrassing. My hair loss makes me feel like less of a woman. I’m already short and fat, why do I also have to be losing my hair? I was never able to wear pretty up-do’s for prom. I won’t be able to wear my hair up at my own wedding (whenever that may be). My hair will be forever bobbed and short. I cry if someone doesn’t cut my hair the right way, because it makes me feel worse.
Top of my head conveniently missing.
For the most part, I’ve made do with what I’ve been given. But, I did have my breaking point over the summer.